Showing posts with label Chuck Norris. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chuck Norris. Show all posts

Saturday, 30 April 2011

The Brazilian Chuck Norris


Mr Harry Borovick pays homage to Chuck Norris' illegitimate son, Jose Aldo.

Firstly, I should clarify: Jose Aldo is not Chuck Norris' son, But if this were true, it would be better than if the UFC's very own Chuck had retired when everyone-but-him knew he should have. In light of this, here are 5 facts you never new about our favourite miniature Brazilian.

1. Jose Aldo's kicks hit so hard he doesn't have to kick a tree to cut it down. He kicks Urijah Faber and a tree falls because its scared.
2. Jose Aldo makes money on the side of fighting by killing cows via face punch for Burger King.
3. Jose Aldo doesn't give a shit, he is the shit.
4. If he gets angry he kicks everything he sees until Dana White hunts him down and fills him full of tranquillizer darts, like a Rhino.
5. Jose Aldo can beat the Incredible Hulk in a "how fast can you KO Cub Swanson" contest.